Lord Vishnu Consults me on Sustainability

On January 21, I suffered from a cardiac attack and was rushed to Hinduja Hospital in Mumbai at the nick of the time. I was operated with two stents and then discharged after a week-long stay at the ICU. This post narrates a bit of my hospital experience

How real is the story? I leave it you to decide

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Lord Vishnu, The Principal Protector God of Hindu Mythology, was after my secretary to seek an appointment. He wanted to take my advice on the Sustainability Management at the Kingdom of Gods. His email to me said that sustainability is not just working out at the Heavens and he thought the problem was with the poor sustainability management on the Earth.

I didn’t have enough time for the Lord as I was busy with some assignments with the World Bank. I proposed instead a quick Skype chat.

When I heard his story, I said “I am not really surprised – first of all you don’t have clear job description and allocation of responsibilities when it comes to sustainability management. You are the supreme God for Protection& Conservation but the other Gods like Vayu, Agni, Varuna  and Goddess Earth who represent important elements of nature i.e. panchmahabhuta  are not well connected to you. They are given sub-ordinate importance like Minister of States in India. You folks don’t meet with each other on regular basis and take up a coordinated approach. There is no common agenda and no practice of sustainability reporting like we do. You remain a Page 3 personality with thousands of temples floating around. The other Gods representing panchamahabhuta who matter to sustainability don’t have many dedicated temples – in fact you can count them on hand – like Tiruvannamalai temple in South India which has in fact manifestation of the five elements by Lord Shiva and not you. See http://www.greenmesg.org/temples_chennai/pancha_bootha_sthalams_chennai.php. Your relationship with Panchamahabhutas is therefore quite confusing at the operational level. Again, there is no integrated perspective given to the worshipers as they worship these panchamahabhutas separately in separate temples. For sustainability communication there should be been just one common temple with you and Lord Shiva at the Centre with Lord Brahma guiding the knowledge. I dont like this isolated approach.

I agree Dr Modak, Lord Vishnu said. Your company visiting card shows all the five elements, well -connected and well balanced.

I thought that was besides the point.

To cut the conversation  short, I said “Well Lord, this is my top end advice, but meet me later for a more detailed discussion.  Let us restructure the Gods and your organization. Please get Lord Indra too as we need to take on some administrative reforms and a new communication strategy. Meet me on January 23 but before coming to my office check with my secretary – I am awfully busy”. I closed the Skype call.

On January 21, I suffered a massive cardiac attack and was rushed to Hinduja Hospital in Mumbai on emergency. On 21^st night, the doctors stabilized me and decided to do an Angiography followed by Angioplasty on 23^rd January.

I was waiting for my turn for the Operation Theater (OT) and was lying on the ICU bed (which seemed to me like a First class seat on Lufthansa). Dr Rajani – a very busy heart specialist – was to perform the “procedure” on me.

Just then, a doctor with unusual tall height appeared in my ICU cubical. He had an impressive mobile and an imported stethoscope. Soon, his image blurred and instead Lord Vishnu appeared – his mobile was replaced by a Shankha and stethoscope by a Pasha. I was shocked to see him.

How the hell did you get in here Lord Vishnu? Didn’t you check with my secretary? She would have told you that I was hospitalized. I was really irritated with his Godly intrusion.

Lord Vishnu spoke to me in Malayalam. And then realized that he is not speaking the language I understand. Sorry Dr Modak, I was busy understanding your case papers with the nurses in the ICU and had to quickly learn the Malayalam language to know what’s gone wrong with you. I did try calling your secretary but kept getting a message not in the reach so decided to check your whereabouts myself.  That’s how I reached this Hospital.

But who issued you the Gate Pass?  I don’t want you to have problems with Hospital administration.

Oh Don’t Worry, Lord Vishnu said, but I had tough time locating you until I said that you work for the World Bank. I did not know that this hospital has a special ICU unit for the staff and consultants of the World Bank! I also came across a special ICU unit for the Ministers where only by-pass surgeries are performed. Apparently when asked the choice between a plasty and a by-pass, the Ministers are interested only the by-pass option as they are generally used to – in practice. And there is another special ICU ward where only rich get admitted to fit stents made of gold.

I was not interested to know these details from Lord Vishnu and was in no mood for such knowledge acquisition. I told him that I will be moved to the OT any time now and that he should simply disappear and take another appointment from my secretary.

Lord Vishnu however insisted that he accompanies me to the OT just to give me company.

How can you do this? And in this Peetamber dress? Do you realize this hospital has a serious business and the hospital is very strict with the rules. Besides, you don’t even have a Gate pass. I repeated.

Leave it to me said Lord Vishnu. Let me understand first your problem once again. He came forward and touched my forehead and closed his eyes. “Aha he said – these reports, ECGs, X-rays don’t give me a holistic picture. Now I understand your situation”

I didn’t quite like this empirical approach of diagnosis. “You should have washed your hands with this disinfectant spray prior touching me” I told the Lord.

But Lord Vishnu just ignored my protest. He rested his hand on my forehead for a while. He then suddenly transformed himself to Dr Rajani. He called the nurses to wheel me to the OT. They did so obediently with all the case papers stacked on the trolley. We crossed the corridors with swinging doors and knifing the chill around us.

When we reached the OT, I was worried what happens if real Dr Rajani was already present. Fortunately he was not. The Team was however there. They positioned me on a narrow bench under a scanning machine. The Anesthetist put in the needle.

Lord Vishnu (as Dr Rajani) then turned to the Anaethesist and said “Fire a shot of 900”. A scintillating fire swirled from my wrist all through  the body like a Sudarshan Chakra.

Images of the movement of the dye started to appear on a large screen. Lord Vishnu told his Team mate “Take me to 100x resolution right here”. “Yes Sir” said he.

Just then the real Dr Rajani walked into the OT. I then saw an amazing transformation. Lord Vishnu cleverly blinded the Team for a second and moved in this tiny time inside the body of real Dr Rajani. I could see a visible shake in him as if he was possessed or getting controlled.

The Real Dr Rajani said “Well Team, we are just in time. Get me stent size  32. Let’s float the ship to the docks and balloon”

The Team Assistant said, “Yes Sir, 32 it is – But Doc, whats the kind of halo I see around you as you are bending down to the screen? Very strange.

Indeed I too noticed the halo.

“You seem to be in Good Hands Dr Modak” Someone said.

I don’t know or recall who said this.

The procedure got over with no event as the doctors say.

I decided not to invoice Lord Vishnu for my advice on sustainability.